It never ceases to amaze me at the variety, abundance and clarity your comments all have, so often. For that, thank you.
Last night’s post on feeling guilty for being in a happy, healthy relationship was tough for me to articulate because part of me didn’t want to write it for fear of my friends actually thinking I am writing about them specifically, when this is really such a feeling I’ve put upon myself, and also because I wasn’t sure how to place my feelings and define them.
But after writing it out and your comments, I realize that part of my feelings is just wanting this for them, too. And being able to share in it.
When I talked to my sister Jess about my idea for the blog post, we got to talking more about it and she said something really eye-opening:
“Don’t ever apologize for investing in your relationship.”
Wow. That is so true. And that is a huge reason why I look at her marriage to my brother in law as one I look at as my model of success. Longevity. Freshness. Love. Friendship. Happiness. Communication. Investment.
And as M and I continue to explore whereever our relationship is leading, we do need to invest in it too. I concentrate so much on trying to keep a solid balance of me, friends, family, and him that I almost put that balance ahead of any of those areas singularly. It’s not so much about forcing the balance between these things, it’s allowing it to naturally happen. And make sure that it doesn’t meander into one area overly much, but allowing it to happen sometimes where there is a reason to.
Like investing in your relationship.
Just as you should invest in yourself and your friends, you should invest in your relationship. There is a critical time for investing in each area of life and when you look at it that way, it all becomes so much clearer.
Hearing that statement and letting it sink in has given me some clarity I really needed. I just need to trust myself more that I am keeping balance as it makes sense, and because I want to, not because I have to, and at the same time, allowing myself to invest in my relationship with M, because he is so special in my life and every day I wake up thankful that we are where we are, with each other. It’s truly an amazing feeling.