Tonight, I sit here proud.
Of M. For PASSING his dissertation defense.
(not that I had any shadow of a doubt that he wouldn’t).
Sitting 900 miles away, I wanted to be with him so badly, to help calm his nerves, hug him, put my hand on the back of his neck and tell him how much faith I have that he would rock his defense tonight. …but I couldn’t. So I did what I could by text, phone call, and Facebook status by way of: sending love, luck and ‘knock ’em dead’ vibes to a certain someone defending their presentation today. Incredibly proud <3. For those of you that know M, he isn’t a huge Facebook’er, but I think my support there, plus everyone else who weighed in (thank you!!), it helped motivate. Even just a little bit more.
As I sat in agony in the last sessions of the day at the conference I am at, I prayed. I channeled every bit of strength, courage and support that I could. And just hoped they somehow helped.
And I sat at dinner…by myself (!), with a glass of wine, sushi and the best bowl of citrus garden vegetable soup EVER, I experienced another kind of pride. Of myself. For finally conquering the dining out alone thang from my travel bucket list. I waited. And waited. For the call.
And when M called and I heard the elation in his voice, I knew. I don’t think I have ever heard him quite this happy. He passed. He’s DONE (save for a few last tweaks to his paper). And this Saturday when he walks through that door to a room full of family, friends and coworkers, I’ll sit there beaming. For pulling off an epic surprise. For gathering a group of people that genuinely care for M and the accomplishment he’s made.
Proud. To stand by a man that means so much to me, the world, truly…a man that has just reached a milestone he tried so hard to reach (and at the same time, tried to quit and run away from, because it was scary, out of his ‘zone, and just plain HARD…but he didn’t. He DID it.). A man that deserves every bit of joy and happiness over finally capturing a goal he’s had for years.