Friday thoughts: where to go from here.

This blog has always been my haven. From the very first day I started my first blog, freshly separated, starting anew, to this blog, which I started as my ‘refresh’ and the me I am now, not defined by divorce any longer, but better for it. It’s absolutely incredible what this community has done for me, to the many ‘blends’ I have met, to those I still plan to meet and would love to meet on my ‘blend bucket list’, and what these years of documenting my life, from what I’ve learned from being single after more than a decade, to ‘learning’ how to date, and getting reacquainted with who I am again, feeling awakened, as if it were my second chance to build the life I was always too afraid to lead. And to today, I look around at my life and it is completely unfathomable that just about 5 years later, I would be married to the man I was meant to be with, really and truly, forever, after a journey that was jam-packed with healing, learning, and most importantly of all, living.

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So now, I sit here and I wonder where to go from here. Where to take this blog and *whether* to take this blog any further. In one sense, I feel as though our marriage is the pinnacle of where I could have ever envisioned this blog to close on, but in another, I don’t know if I am ready to say goodbye and to shutter ‘Determined to Be’ forever. ┬áThus why I’ve been so quiet, leading into our wedding and our move (besides being crazy busy!), I’ve just been thinking about what I want to do, and if I want to take it further (reading Tina’s latest post, and it’s as if our minds are in sync!). I haven’t quite decided,

So, there you have it, some thoughts on this fabulous Friday. I’m mulling over ideas this weekend as M and I seize the opportunity to ‘staycate’ during our one and only weekend this summer of zero – intentional – plans. Priorities, balance, and life…it all kinda comes together, doesn’t it?

Cheers friends :)

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24 thoughts on “Friday thoughts: where to go from here.

  1. I totally get it. I’ve been blogging for five years too and at some points I feel like I’ve said it all and have nothing left to say.

    1. Right? And it goes in ebbs and flows of course. I just wonder if my blog has run its course as is and if I even have time for it. For me, the best thing about blogging is doing it consistently and if I am not going to, maybe I shouldn’t do it at all? I dunno.

  2. I’ve loved hearing your journey and would love to hear more, but completely understand that weird feeling you’re having right now. I’ve had a lot of uncertainty as well…trying to find my voice on my new blog. It’s a different game than what it was when we first started. Enjoy your weekend of relaxation!

    1. Thanks friend! I have loved sharing my journey. it’s been an incredible one! That is what I struggle with. Do I want to keep sharing or just live it, instead?

  3. I feel you friend. I really do. I’m coming up on 4 years and I’ve loved so much about it. But over the past year, I’ve also realize how much it’s taken me away from living in the present. So that means I’ve been blogging a lot less that normal. Partially sad. Partially not. I say you play it by ear.

    1. I have been playing it by ear. Part of me wants to keep it and just dabble, but part of me just thinks if I feel it’s the end, then maybe it’s the end and why not go out with a bang ;-)

  4. So here’s my question: Why do you have to make a decision? Why not just leave the blog, and write if you feel like it, and if you don’t…then don’t? There are no “rules” to blogging….you can make this blog be whatever you want it to be. Don’t stress about it — just enjoy!

    1. I just feel like if I am not going to give it the attention it deserves, then perhaps it’s time to just end with a bang. Conclude my blog here, with our marriage, and my thoughts on this journey so far. And if I want to come back to it later, perhaps in a different blog entirely, so be it. It’s not a stress thing, it’s just feeling ready to conclude, I think. If that makes sense.

      1. I was agreeing with Sunshine… mostly because I’ve said the same things about my blog. Should I continue? Why? It is serving me anymore or is it just a place for me to vent occasionally.

        I hear you though. You already closed one blog/chapter. I could see you closing this one and maybe starting a new one when you get pregnant. ;)

        1. You and Sunshine are both clamoring on the kids thing today ;-) Too funny. Yea, I struggle with what to do here with this ole home of mine. we shall see :)

  5. I’m so happy for you. I’m like you in that I used my blog as a way to grow and create the life I dreamed of but now that I have it I have less to say, less to comment on and more importantly I have a lot of living to be doing in this new life I created. We will all support you whatever the decision!

    1. Right! Less to say, how is that, right?! But it’s so true. I just think that perhaps, if anything, I stop for awhile, and come back later with a new blog perhaps, if I miss it and have enough to say ;-)

  6. oh i think we can all relate. But i am also glad we can now SEE each other via other social media outlets that don’t take our time, like instagram. Phew! Either way, you know we are here because of you, no matter where you go. And I know your #, so i’ll stalk you to the end. LOL!

  7. I totally can understand this too and I’ve only been blogging for just under 2 years! I love being able to write and to have the outlet but I often wonder where all of this is going. Not that it has to go towards some end but just maybe checking in on my motivations for doing this and for keeping it up. It has taken time away from family and friends but it has also encouraged me to do things and to seek out things that I’m passionate about. I agree with Lindsay – I’m glad that there are other social media outlets through which we can stalk each other :-)

    1. Exactly! ALL of this jumbles together in my brain and I just don’t know what I want to do. I don’t want this little haven to die just sitting here if I don’t write often enough, but I don’t know if I am ready to just close it down either. I have loved this so much, but time and priorities are sort of tying into this too. Tough to juggle it all! But I am all for stalking :) XO

  8. I was thinking about these things today. I abandoned my blog well over a year (or two?) ago. I found that the reasons I created it (as an outlet to evaluate my divorce and dating life) no longer lent themselves to the life that is now defining who I am. I am in SUCH a different place now. But you hit the nail on the head with that statement above: each and every little thing we have experienced along the way has contributed to our being able to attain the happiness we have now.

    1. Absolutely on the same page!! Our experiences MADE us who we are today!! I miss writing, and wonder if I will keep this little home, or if I will morph it into something new, or if I will just let time decide. For now, time shall decide and I shall just be. XO

  9. I hear ya. I think about this all the time. Sometimes I wish I had a lifestyle blog that was just about my decorating likes and recipes and crafting, but then I realize I’d probably start pouring my heart out on that blog too and turn it right back in to the same thing. I am not as moved on as you or some of the other divorce bloggers, but then again, I hardly need to write about that everyday. Not even close. I see Misty posted above. I was just looking at my blogroll the other day and realizing that everyone I originally followed has either abandoned their original or changed it altogether. I guess that’s a good sign.

    1. For me too, though, it’s more about prioritizing and sometimes, writing just isn’t as big a priority right now and I feel neglectful leaving this open and not writing at all…if that makes sense. So I am not sure yet what I want to do. I miss writing sometimes, but not as often as I thought I would. Which is weird.

      1. Not weird at all, you are busy these days. You just don’t need it like you used to. I didn’t post for a month until this week. I think you should leave it open though, because I like to read through people’s old blogs. Maybe it would help somebody to read your backstory and realized you moved on. No harm in leaving it out in cyberspace.

        1. I agree, though, too, I don’t want to close it down completely, but I feel like I should at least conclude it, and then leave it open for anyone to read. Rather than let it languish and just not post or conclude,…if that makes sense.

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