I’ve recently been admiring those around me, near and afar, and the marriages, partnerships, and teams (of two!) they’ve created, and, in parallel, my marriage to M, and the partnership we are creating.
And there spawned my idea.
The MFEO chronicles. (MFEO = made for each other)
I plan to chronicle some stories from some of those I admire in this community (and outside of it, too) and what makes them MFEO. From the good, *and* the not so perfect.
Because, this is, after all, the perfectly imperfect me, right? And what better way to remind myself and you, that to be ‘made for each other’ doesn’t mean perfect. This also holds true for life, generally, and our individual selves. It’s not about perfection. It’s about striking that ‘just right’ balance that makes us who we are, and who we are together so natural and right.
With M, I know we are MFEO because…
…he can make me laugh like no other. It could be the crassest joke, to the simplest – yet funniest – word choice, but I just laugh – like, really really laugh – when I am with him hysterically, all the time. Daily, even. We ‘get’ each others’ humor eerily well, and even when *my *particular jokes don’t go over as successfully as his, he still laughs, or at least amuses himself that I am cracking myself up
…I trust him with all of my heart. And he trust me equally as much. Trust was something I realized I didn’t know how or when to trust, when I started dating after divorce. How long does it take to trust someone’s words at face value? After being with someone for 10 years, that trust is second nature, and you don’t really realize *when* the trust began, so when you start from scratch, when to trust becomes a scary, scary thing. I started out trusting immediately, and got burned, immediately, and once I met M, I wanted to trust so much, but was afraid to. But I soon realized then, and even more now, that he is, of just about anyone in my life, the most trustworthy – and respectful – man I have ever met.
…we can argue, and be frustrated, and get mad at each other. And it’s still okay. In fact, it brings us closer. It could be a simple misunderstanding blown out of proportion (guilty as charged, more often than I’d like), or it could actually be a longer standing issue that takes awhile to get through, that takes many reminders and conversations and frustration. But working through that, and really talking about it, even when it gets uncomfortable, is what makes us better individually, and together.
…we respect each other’s strengths and lift up each other’s weaknesses. We are a team. Isn’t that truly what a partnership is all about? He’s chill. I’m…type A, more rigid (than I’d like to be…working on it!). He calms me. I add structure (where needed) and GSD (get sh*t done) when sometimes he may be procrastinating. We motivate each other, we keep each other going, and we make goals together *and* achieve them.
It’s been a little less than 3.5 years since we met, and 8 months of marriage, yet I know our foundation is strong, we are strong together, and strong as individuals, and I cannot wait to see what our ‘MFEO’ years look like 5, 10, 15, 20 years from now. And I can’t wait to share stories from those that HAVE been together for this many years, to explore their stories, and embrace the lessons they’ve learned.