Determined. To Be…

…a runner, a sister, a lover…living a fit and happy life.

Tag Archives: fitness


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On intuition.

Lately I’ve been struck by my sense of intuition on some things. Some of which I won’t share in detail (such a tease, I know…), but a few that I think are just more ongoing ‘a-ha’ moments for me as I grow as a barre n9ne instructor and student and as a mindful, intuitive eater.

Intuition lately has been telling me to not rush things.

Not try to ‘can’t wait’ past the very present. The moments that matter.

The in-between moments that will otherwise be lost, forgotten or not even noticed to begin with.

It feels like an incredibly special time in my life right now, from my life with M, as we move forward towards uniting our lives forever, to continuing to focus on balance and prioritizing what and who matter, like my sisters, my niece, the friends that ‘get’ me most.

Intuition is telling me to keep focusing on ‘feeling the room’ when I am teaching a barre n9ne class, ease up ever so gently if there is struggle (beyond the point where it should be, where form suffers), offer words of guidance and support, help clients refocus and snap back to the present, as they too can drift off and not focus and push and break through barriers. (it also is a gentle reminder to me, when I am a student in class, to channel the very words I speak, and work and hone).

Intuition is telling me when to eat, and when to stop. It is telling me when I am hungry, and when I am bored, or stuck in a habit. It is an ongoing, lifelong process, but this intuitive eating thing…gets easier and easier the more I listen to that intuition and mindfulness. It’s about peace. Not struggle.

Intuition is also telling me when to ease up on my own workouts, on my body, and well, on myself. Stop trying to be do it all or be regimented.

Intuition is urging me to let go a little. (M is also really good at helping me practice this, just by nature of how chill he is. About everything. From getting married, to what to make for dinner!) I need to be more vicarious because the more planned I am, the more boxed in I feel and the less I enjoy any of those carefully made plans (my favorite pin lately on Pinterest? Something along the lines of, I can be spontaneous if it is carefully planned <–that is so me!).

Most importantly, intuition is guiding me in my life. Intuition of the faith variety. It helps me feel centered. It helps me realize when I am losing sight of what is important, or getting caught up in the details or the excitement of something and not looking at it realistically. (this is where the vagueness comes in…). Intuition is telling me that ‘life is never simple. But don’t fret. It will all work out as need be.’ <–wise words of Ms Lindsay yesterday as I tweeted out some frustration. Thank you friend, it was e-xactly what I needed at that very moment.

I think this year, while it has been one of the best years of my life so far, it has also taught me so very much in terms of listening to myself, my body, my intuition. Letting it guide me. Breaking past the stubbornness. And letting go just a little bit more. Living more freely, and ‘sitting down’ when I need to.


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Scratching the surface.

As I was responding to all of your beautiful comments, congratulations and sentiments about our two year anniversary, it struck me.

Our relationship, our bond and partnership? It’s just scratching the surface.

Like in all things in life, we are just at the beginning, truly, in the depths of our love and journey together.

In a way? That’s extremely humbling. And in another way? It gives me a sense of peace, gratitude, and excitement.

If these have been the best years of my life, what’s ahead? What else do we have to look forward to, to conquer together, to strengthen? So. SO much.

I think the same holds true for many areas of my life. This ‘scratching the surface’ mantra.

My barre n9ne journey, for example. Including teaching, and continuing my quest for mindful and intuitive eating. I declared peace with food, but it is an everyday quest (I won’t say battle, because it’s more about cognizance than anything for me at this point). And when I look back at the one year ‘there is no end game’ post and where I was mentally and physically? I feel like I’ve already come so much farther since then. And that was just a mere four months ago. 

And finally, my life, in general. It’s just scratching the surface. From continuing to focus on balance, priorities and UNplanning, to slowing down. The Lindsay challenge that I am going to try to abide by this month and, hopefully, onward.  To looking around and realizing that this life is one that is meant to be lived, not rushing through, not trying to get to ‘the good parts’ to not hoping for things that will come in time, when they’re meant to, to realizing that this life we only get one shot at.

Enjoy it. All of it. Because we’re just scratching the surface on what’s to come.

I hope this makes sense. It’s sort of what’s flowing in my brain at the moment. And what about you? What’s just scratching the surface in your life? When you really step back and think about it? You can find it in just about every area of your life, I am willing to guess. And that’s a good thing.

 

 

 


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On being at peace with food.

Yesterday, it hit me.

I am finally at peace with food. 

No emotional tie or ‘pull’ 24/7 towards more, more, more.

No food as happiness, but food as fuel (it can still be fun, though!)

No ‘fighting’ the log, in terms of calorie counting (yes, I still count, but I also allow for life to happen and sometimes that means loosely tracking and being mindful).

No deprivation.

No wishing I could eat this or that. Because I can eat this or that. I can eat anything I want, truly, as long as it is balanced by the rest of my eats for the day.

And that has become my magic bullet for success. Combined with the barre n9ne 60-day challenge, joining the barre n9ne family and running, I am reaching that state where I am at peace. With food. With my body. With my approach to health.

No comparisons. No numbers. No fixating. 

Peace. Peace. Peace.

As I wrote in my 60-day challenge retrospective, there is no end game. This. Is. My. Life. And it couldn’t feel more right, more focused, more fun and more balanced. It’s amazing what being at peace with food can bring, truly. Harnessing mindfulness in this crucial area has completely spilled over into other areas of my life and while I am still working on that mindful balancing act in overplanning etc., having a strong foundation in all things food has really been key for me.

So, if you find yourself struggling with want, want, want, and more, more,  more, take a step back, think about it and ask yourself “why?” And the more you do that, the more you listen to your body’s cues on what will fuel and satisfy you. It takes time (a LOT of time!), patience and determination, but once you reach that pinnacle, it’s like a lightbulb flicks on and it becomes intuitive.

Being at peace with food is so much more than ‘just’ food. It’s simply…peaceful.


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Learning to ‘sit down.’

Today’s ‘Girlfriends in God’ passage was particularly powerful for me. I continually struggle with balancing do-it-all-let’s-go-go-go, with taking a step back and realizing that sometimes less is most definitely more.

In  my commitments. To family, friends, and last but not least, myself.

In my fitness. Sticking closer to the ‘work smarter, not harder’ mantra.

In my eating. Continuing on the log as a tool, not as a hard and fast rule. In ‘setting it and forgetting it’ (rather than letting it consume my thoughts)

In my faith. In strengthening my relationship with God. In faith in myself. In faith in my life path.

When you cram all of that together, all of those goals, all of those…things, it takes up a lot of space in my brain, in my habits, in my day.

When do I ‘sit down?’

When do I let the process happen.

Rather than poke and prod it to death?

THIS:

We all struggle with balance and the inevitable battle with stress that struggle creates. When we refuse to balance the sometimes overwhelming demands of work, home, family, friends, and personal growth, stress will be the natural result. What we really need is a holy balance only God can bring. The story of Mary and Martha, two very different women, offers valuable truths about balance that we can apply to our lives today.

A balanced life is focused on right things. <-hello epiphany!! 

AND THIS:

Choosing to sit at the feet of Jesus requires decisive planning, purposeful scheduling and a willful determination. Every day, God wants relationship building time with us, which means that time at His feet, in His presence must be our highest priority…It is amazing to me how I can squander away the best part of my day, leaving God with the leftover scraps of time and then have the audacity to complain that my life is void of power and purpose. Distractions come from every side. Some of those distractions are good and wonderful things, but they are all still wrong things if they keep us from stopping to spend time with God. We make daily choices about where we invest our time as we run errands, plan meals, deal with children, clean house, and do laundry – but fail to schedule the most important activity of all, spending time with God.

Investing my time. My time is an investment. Just as is all of our time. It is valuable and it deserve to be made a priority. Not squandered away. Not OVER-planned down to a point of stress and losing sight of that importance. (This Lindsay also makes some great points on prioritizing and simplifying – I am constantly learning from you, girl!!)

I’ve been letting my ‘smarter, not harder’ mantra get the best of me…because I’ve been reversing it. Harder, NOT smarter. For example, when I read Lindsay’s post ‘dear overexercising’ – wow, that hit home. While I think for the most part I strike a good balance with my workouts and my teaching, the lines are blurring a little. I put too much pressure on myself to cram it all in. And instead of smarter, it’s just harder. And it’s not productive.

The same goes with the other areas in my life I mentioned above. I need to prioritize. Not try to do it all because I know I can, or because I am *that* productive. Honoring the investment. Honoring the time. And instead making quality investments with my time. Back to balancing too little with too much and hitting the balance of ‘just right’ in all aspects of my life.

I’m learning to sit down. (Again) going back to basics. And I already feel more balanced and ‘free’ just thinking about it. Take a step back, look at your time ‘investments’ and when you think of them that way, they mean so much more, don’t they? 

 


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Things I’m loving Friday…simply.

I had this whole draft post started on unexpected occurrences that happened this week and why I’m loving them.

But then.

Do you ever re-read something and think it just sounds too boring/rambly/too surfaced and scratch that? Well, that’s what I did today. Because while the things I’m loving today haven’t changed from the post I started, how I want to portray them, did.

So…things I’m loving Friday…simply.

#Fitdate with besties that care, ‘get’ me and vice versa. Fit in several of these this week – unexpectedly – with Steph and my sis, and it made each class, each run that much more fun, sweaty, and memorable.

 

Funday Monday fancy schmancy dinner for two…grilled salmon and the best scallops M has ever made – it was one of those Mondays we just NEEDED. Unexpected, perfect, just us, talking, enjoying.

 

Not unexpected at all, I realize. But. Oatmeal. I just can’t quit you. Especially with fresh berries? #drool

 

Teaching a butt-load of classes. Between yesterday and Monday, I will have taught 8 classes (hadn’t realized how many extras I tacked on, subbing for other instructors). It. Never. Gets. Old. #lovinglife

 

This man. It was kind of a strange week, I feel like we were almost ships in the night on several occasions, but then I realized how many perfect moments we had this week and I felt even more lucky to have such a man in my life, and so many opportunities to share so much of our lives together. From running, to friends, to vacations, to family, to living together. It’s a blessing and sometimes I unexpectedly realize that in simple moments like last night, over a snuggle in silence.

 

This week, I had SO much to look forward to. I celebrated #littlethings each day and even with that? I unexpectedly realized even more things that make me happy, that make me realize how incredibly blessed I am, and that make me want to keep doing what I’m doing, in life, in fitness, and in work. Life, my friends, is quite simply…unexpectedly good. In so many ways. Take time to count those little blessings, you’ll be amazed at what pops up sometimes.

Cheers friends, to a beautiful weekend ahead, and the perfect mix of planned/unplanned. Needed. 

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