Tag Archives: happiness

May30

On the Importance of time and priorities.

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On the Importance of time and priorities.

I read Girlfriends in God every morning (thanks to Lindsay for recommending it!!) and there were two recent passages that really struck home for me. (even if you are not a ‘religious’ type, these devotionals are so good and so right-on almost every single day. Worth a read, I promise!) They both have to do with time and this is a post I have been wanting to write for a couple of weeks, but alas, needed the time to put some thought into it, ironic, isn’t it? (I started this post on my last flight home – plenty of time!)

This passage is what really resonated with me, when it comes to time, priorities, and what’s really important:

We have either forgotten or failed to realize the truth that our minutes, hours and days are precious commodities — gifts from God that can be unwrapped only once…A busy life is not necessarily a productive life.

The author goes on to say that we should choose one day to plan the week (vs. me – who tries to plan, overplan, and plan some more – almost to my detriment, being overplanned and overthinking every plan I have made, throwing me into an OATTing tizzy. A tiring combination).

She also says ‘simplify and eliminate’ – this is something I have learned and keep trying to do more of this. It’s about prioritizing and more importantly, keeping some of that time FREE, not booked to the minute. M always jokes that I plan every minute of our time together. And he’s right. I tend to do that and then it’s just not as fun when I feel like we’re rushing around and not actually enjoying WHAT we planned to do. The picnic we had recently was a perfect example of a plan that was not planned. Something we did with no ‘end time’ in sight. Just for as long as we wanted. We laid in the grass, my head on his chest and just watched the clouds drift through the blue skies.

And finally, THIS is what truly says it all:

If we don’t set priorities — others will. Time thieves will steal our time as we allow them to impose their plans and standards on us. It is so easy to lose focus and scramble priorities.

As I just finished up what feels like a whirlwind 6 weeks of traveling (3 work trips in those 6 weeks!), kick-starting barre n9ne teaching, and a really hectic couple of months of work, I am taking a minute to hit the reset button. Summer is ALWAYS notoriously busy. And, with all fun things, for the most part. Lots of parties, cookouts, Maine, (maybe) the Cape, and more (fun) travel. But with a busy summer can also come that blur of where-did-summer-go and ‘did I even enjoy it as much as I possibly could?‘ feeling. Because, having a busy life, while GOOD, can also have a way of stealing joy out of those times. Just by nature of time, and lack thereof.  (at least for me)

And the final kicker that I NEED to really think about time and priorities? When it took THREE WEEKS to plan a sister dinner, and one that almost got canceled last night at the last minute (where we then realized that if we didn’t keep to our original plan, it was at least another two weeks until we could book our dinner again…for sisters that all live within 20-30 miles of each other? That is simply wrong.). And that sister dinner we had last night? One of the best nights we’ve had together, just us, in a very long time. A dinner we now vow to do on the first Tuesday of every month (hold us to it, ok?!).

So, this is me. Stopping. Thinking. Prioritizing. And keeping time open. Because sometimes, the best things happen when they are unplanned. As a matter of fact, I’m pretty sure the BEST things happen when they aren’t planned.

May25

5 for Friday!

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5 for Friday!

Raise your hand if you are incredibly glad it is a) Friday and b) a long weekend!! *raising hand so high, like that eager 5th grader, holding it so high, you have to hold it up with the *other* arm high, because you really want everyone to know your hand is raised wicked high*

;-)

I’m gonna keep it simple and do a little 5 for Friday action. Here you be:

  • 3 ‘fit’ things I did on my trip this week: I went on 3 strong runs, outside, by myself. And save for a few side cramps (I’m always less hydrated when I travel, just by nature of less readily accessible water. Probably my number #1 peeve when I travel!), they were good, strong runs. I wasn’t up in my head, I smiled, I looked around, my mind wandered, I smelled flowers, I heard birds, I breathed fresh air, and it was honestly the best way to kick start my day (especially yesterday, before my long trek home. Nothing worse than parking my a$$ on a plane all day and being inactive before it!). I took a barre class at a local studio I discovered on one of my visits last fall. Got a mini-barre fix but admittedly cannot wait to get back to taking and teaching classes today and this weekend!
  • 2 meals I ate: Well, let’s back up. I made good choices during all of my meals this week. Yep, all of them. People ask me how I still manage to stay on track with my ‘number’ when I travel and my answer? While I can’t be sure, most of the time, what the calories are in a particular meal (unless I can find it online and I am a pro at googling, myfitnesspal’ing and web site stalking to find it!), I can draw conclusions based on said googling or ‘like’ restaurants or meals and simply make a choice that will satisfy me – high protein, lottsa veggies, and as fresh as possible. For example, at lunch with my boss, I ordered a roasted chicken salad, which came with dates (YUM!), almonds, corn, chicken, shredded cabbage, greens and goat cheese. When it arrived, I evaluated the cheese serving – and it was perfect, just a few crumbles (given that could be a huge hidden calorie bust!) and I requested dressing on the side, and with all those yummies loaded in, I didn’t even need the dressing. Had some olives and white bean hummus that my boss ordered as an app and ya know what? I was completely satisfied all the way through that barre class I took, did not even need an afternoon snack. Go figure. My most favorite meal was the Jamba Juice apple cinnamon oatmeal I scored (thanks sis for highly recommending a la Naomi!), holy CRAP, it was so good, I honestly was blown away. SO EFFING GOOD. (Oh, and I always pack a few Dove promises as a little treat before bed (just like at home!)).
  • Coolest thing that happened while I was traveling: M bought a new car! I totally CALLED it last weekend when he just happened to mentioned being interested in a possible trade in for his SUV for a Mitsubishi Lancer and I said, ‘you’re going to pick me up at the airport in a new car, aren’t you?’ And yep, I called it. Brand new black Lancer…and he looks HOT in it, let me tell you ;-) Swoon!
  • Number 1 thing I am looking forward to this weekend: The official kick-off to summer, plain and simple. The weather is going to cooperate, and I have lots of outdoor things planned, including my sister’s bash for my brother-in-law’s birthday, the BEACH and perhaps even a day trip to Maine (game day decision!), or another picnic at the park. There’s something so euphoric about summer, isn’t there?
  • Best part about coming home from this work trip: That first hug and kiss from M. And the realization that after 3 work trips in 6 weeks, I am DONE *fingers crossed* for the time being, and my next trip…only for pleasure, at the end of June. I’ll share more details soon, but it may have to do with wine ;-)

CHEERS friends, I hope you have a fabulous long weekend and spend as much time as humanly possible outside! I know I will be!!

May22

A year later: before and after: there is no ‘end game.’

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A year later: before and after: there is no ‘end game.’

Visualize the end game. The result.

That’s what you’re supposed to do when you set out on a journey, a challenge, towards a goal.

But at first, I never could quite visualize the end game, the result, from the opportunity I was granted a year ago for the barre n9ne 60 day challenge.

Why?

Because I didn’t quite believe. In myself. Or even in the challenge facing me. Or in all that it could be, if I set my mind to it.

I was used to going halfway and stopping.

I was used to the field goal.

I had never achieved the results I wanted or thought I could attain. I didn’t believe in “smarter, not harder.” I didn’t believe, even, (not fully) in lifestyle change.

On day one, this was the me I was then. Not quite believing…hoping, not unable to visualize. 

Frustrated with myself physically, feeling like a hamster on a wheel spinning and spinning but with little to show for it, not understanding that I had lost the ability to see moderation in my eats, and having lower self esteem than I ever wanted to admit or be faced with. Day one of the 60 day challenge was a scary day for me. Because it meant facing the things that I had ignored and pushed aside for fear of number fixation, the reality of the situation and doing something I’d never done before. *Not* stopping at the field goal…but going for the touchdown.

The last year has been a year out of my comfort zone, and not only has it taught me that I have the power to reach the goals in which I set for myself, for perhaps the first time in my life, it’s also given me an opportunity I never thought possible. To pay forward what I have learned, in lifestyle changes, the power of a barre workout and how to finally – finally – be comfortable in my own skin.

And, as a result?…this is the me I am now.

When I took this picture, I saw it for the first time. The end game that I never thought possible. I had achieved the ‘after’ that I always envied on infomercials (even pooh-pooh’ing the words these ‘success story’ spokespeople said…words like life-changing, being the me I always wanted to be, etc), losing the inches, pants sizes and weight. Perhaps the best part of seeing this picture? Besides the renewed gleam in my eye that speaks happiness, confidence and pride?

Realizing that there is no end game.This is the life I have built for myself.

And it is the life that I will continue. Moderation, real, wholesome, fueling foods, and a love for barre n9ne, from teaching, to taking classes.  This life. A life that rails against the word ‘diet,’ that focuses on real foods, no gimmicks and the magic bullet of consistency that has opened the door to the happy medium I never thought was possible.

And ultimately? This is a life that I will continue to pay forward.  Because this happy medium life is pretty damn good . Thank you, Tanya, for your belief in us, to my sister Jess in sharing this journey with me (read her post here on her results and thoughts on the last year!), to the barre n9ne community for being such a supportive family (and believing in us then, as the first ‘challenges’ and now, as instructors), and to all of you – my family and friends, for supporting, encouraging and believing.

**as I hit ‘publish’ on this, know that it took a lot of thought and decision-making on posting my before and after pictures…because as much as this journey has of course, been about weight and inches lost, that’s not *all* it has been. I think that goes without saying…but, I just thought it was worth mentioning again.**

May21

A blissful weekend…in pictures.

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A blissful weekend…in pictures.

As I trot off to California for the next four days, I will sear into memory a blissful weekend that I truly believe was even MORE blissful because of shifting my focus and not going into this trip with any sort of ‘dread’ (except for the goodbye to M, which is always, always so hard), but with perspective that it’ll be a fantastic experience, filled with growth.

Without further ado…

Another ‘happy miles’ run with M, even if a bee did chase me and I ran like the wind ;-)

got my sushi fix on Friday night, with a glass of wine on the patio

Impromptu trip to the lake on Saturday…check out that glisten.

got to dip my toes into the lake, not as chilly as I thought, either ;-)

a sister cookout at Jess and Scott’s, never complete without a photo bomb ;)

I <3 my sisters!

Complete with dinner on the deck and a crisp rose, and the weekend rounds out to a beautiful close…

And on a weekend that has marked the passing of my Nonna (May 20, 2009), I couldn’t help but think that this picture perfect weekend is her, smiling down, happy to see the happiness and love in my life, and in my sister’s lives too. I hugged my niece a little tighter, with her namesake (Isabel) and just smiled, my heart happy.

She climbed right up into my lap…and though it was just briefly, it’s captured.

~~~

May14

More than just a graduation.

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More than just a graduation.

This weekend, M graduated. For the fourth (!) and final time. Two bachelor’s degrees, one master’s and now a doctorate later, and M is done, accomplishing something very few ever do, and I couldn’t have been prouder of him walking across that stage getting his degree.

It was the first time I’d truly seen such pride in his face. For once, basking in it, rather than brushing it off, or just going through the motions towards that finish line to get.it.done.

And while I wish I had known him throughout this entire process, seeing him through perhaps the toughest part of his degree, supporting him the best that I possibly could, and throwing him one hell of a party, makes me feel so blessed and fortunate to be a part of his life now, meeting him at such a pivotal time, for him, but also for me.

Because, you see, his graduation day also marked my one year barre n9ne 60 day challenge barre-o-versary. During a weekend of celebration, it was a weekend where I felt as though everything in my life had fallen into place exactly where I wanted, for the very first time. From my life, to my love, to my body.

And when I asked M if he were to make a speech, what he would say, he said ‘I would look around at my friends, my family, and you, and say that three years ago when I started on this journey, I never imagined the people around this table would be around this table today, but I couldn’t be happier.’ 

I couldn’t agree more. 

For him, through a marriage ending in divorce mid-way through his degree, to finding each other, at the exact right time in our lives, and for me, walking into barre n9ne a year ago, never expecting to experience a complete and utter transformation from mind, body, and soul, just as I feel the last three years of my life, in parallel to M’s has been. Full of complete change, struggle, sadness and pain, to strength, confidence, happiness and love.

This weekend, it was more than a graduation. It was the culmination of the last three years of our lives, so gently meeting at the same intersection, together. As it were meant to be. 

And if this picture doesn’t capture the essence of the weekend, and this culmination, I don’t know what does. As a friend on Facebook noted,: ‘you’ll look so content and happy and totally blissed out.” And she was right. <3

~~

I don’t normally cross-post to M’s blog, but he wrote a post that made me speechless. It really speaks to his journey from here until now, and if you have the time, please give it a read. Congratulations, love, you are amazing.

~~

As for the 60 day challenge barre-o-versary, there is more to come, including a before and after picture. But this post just felt like the essence of what I was feeling and thus, the before and after can wait ;-)